sweat on the back of my knees and the kkk: things that make me uncomfortable

Well, now that I have experienced one of the longest Minnesota winters in recent history, I think I can safely say this: I prefer snow in May to heat and humidity in November.

When people asked why I wasn't worried about moving to Minneapolis, I shrugged. I like cold weather, I told them. (Then I went behind their back and made a really passive agressive video about them.) 

You'll see, they said.  You're going to wish you never left. You haven't experienced real winter.

Sure, I have!
 I replied. One time I went to Chicago and wore a scarf and light jacket! AND, there is a photo of me as a baby building a snowman on my high chair in a freak Houston snowstorm.

They were right, of course. With the exception of three early childhood years in Holland, I was born and raised in Texas and Louisiana. Winter was a three-day stretch in December where the temperature dipped to 37 degrees.

But you know what? I just had a feeling I would be okay.

In Louisiana, my entire life I've dreaded spring, because I know that after spring comes summer and with it, the sticky feeling of being trapped in my own skin -- sweaty, pale skin that I don't think was ever meant to be exposed to sunlight. 

this is how I feel about heat. my bangs agree.

I can't explain why I can't stand the feel of sweat pooling on the backs of my knees, or sweaty curls stuck to the back of my neck, or the smell of hot pavement after a 90 degree rainstorm. I just know that by the end of a Louisiana June, most of the time I just want to curl up in a cool, dark corner for the next 4 months, when I can finally walk outside and feel a chill in the air. 

The point of my post: hot weather makes me uncomfortable.

You know what else makes me uncomfortable? When you're enjoying a nice lunch on a patio, and someone at your table -- who, in his defense, is not from this country and possibly isn't too familiar with American History -- decides to make a mask to entertain the child at the table who is quickly growing restless.